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Family Stress



How do you feel RIGHT NOW? Are you stressed? I know I find myself feeling stressed every single day, but did you know that with out stress, you, and your existence in this world, is in danger? I certainly didn't know that until about two days ago--it makes me feel justified in my stresses. ;) However, excessive amounts of stress and anxiety is not good. Stress can cause acne, headaches, stomach pain, lack of energy, depression, digestive issues, and even cause a rift in your relationships. This week I have thought a lot about family stress in particular.
How is family stress different from someone's individual stress? Well, first, family stress effects multiple people. It also might change how family members act in every day activities and decisions. Stress that you feel within a family also means that you aren't along in your feelings and you have many people around you who can empathize--together you can work through your difficult times. Individual stress can be more personal, not everyone in your family or in your social groups will be stressed about the same things you are. While you are never alone with your stresses and anxieties, I think many people feel alone and may even feel hopeless when overcome with stress. Stress, no matter individually or within a family, affects your life.
Today, however, I am going focus on stress within the family.
When someone is stressed in a family, it can influence everyones' mood. When you or a family member experiences a stressor, you might:
- assign blame
- feel shameful or depressed
- revert back to your old habits
- feel denial
- avoid the problem or stressor
- find comfort outside of marriage
Sometimes these reactions to stress can push family members away from each other and disrupt the entire family system as a whole.
In the past weeks we have discussed the importance of families and staying faithful to them. When a stressor arises within a family, it should stay within the family, especially within a marriage. While it may be tempting to talk to those you care about outside of your marriage, like your friend, or coworker, it really isn't wise. Together as a family, you can work together to know how to reduce stress and focus on what is important.
While we certainly don't see it when we are experiencing stress, relationships can actually grow closer and change for the better because of those challenging experiences.
As I look back, I have seen this in my own family as we have adjusted TOGETHER to a new way of life. I think my family system really started to change about four years ago. I can still remember where I was sitting when my mom sat the family down to tell us life changing news. I can also remember the flood of tears that escaped my eyes soon after. We sat for at least an hour, all seven of us, talking about how our life would be different and what we would need to do. My mom told us that the most important thing, was to love the new experiences we would soon have in our life. It was hard. The following year and a half were extremely difficult for my family. Looking back at our family system then, and how we didn't feel we needed any new changes or additions, I can see that the family system we have today is much better and filled with much more love.
If you sit for a second and think about your family I am positive you will see how family stressors and crisis' in your life have affected everyone as a whole. Because stress has a huge impact on families, it is important to handle stress with extreme care. When you are stressed, reach out to those around you in your families, especially with your spouse. Talk with them and build your relationship throughout this difficult time.
Stress is a necessary part of life where we get to learn and grow. When you feel stress, remember that the most important thing is to turn to those around you who love you. You aren't alone and you will be able to make it through difficult times with the help from others.
You got this!

Karlie

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